Reversing Vandalism

It hurts to see a book vandalized because books seem so precious, but when vandalism is done out of hatred, the pain is deeper. When an inanimate object is slashed and carved up solely because of its LGBT content, there is a hurt that starts behind the eyes, emits a sigh through the mouth, travels down to an aching heart, nicks a vein and then leaves a sinking feeling in the stomach. These scars we carry.

Just Too Damn Queer is a combination of two vandalized books: Too Queer/Essays from a Radical Life by Victoria A. Brownworth and Sin, Sickness and Sanity/A History of Sexual Attitudes by Vern Bullough, Ph.D. and Bonnie Bullough, Ph.D.

At the same time that I was working on my three books for the Reversing Vandalism show, I was working on a lifesize book called OUT: Victims of Anti-Gay Murder. It is about people who were killed because of their identity, because of their sexual preference. My lifesize book and these vandalized books are so connected, unfortunately, because they all show the unbridled and twisted hatred that still exists towards LGBT people. As progressive as we think everyone is in San Francisco, let’s not fool ourselves. We see the evidence that there is no blanket acceptance of LGBT people here either. I wondered as I worked on these books: how many steps are there between showing your hatred toward an idea, i.e. vandalizing a gay book, and hurting someone who is gay?

When I saw that this vandalized book, Lesbian Lives by Dr. Nicky Hallett, was slashed open, I decided to bring the text outside myself. My anger at the vandal who slashed off the cover, leaving the book exposed, made me wonder what right he had to vandalize this book that not only wasn’t his but was also about a topic he hates. When I took this book to rework it into art, it became mine to do with as I please. My “vandalism” however, has a purpose. I took the best text from each page I read and placed it outside so the reader could better access it.

How totally enraging that the vandal of HEARING US OUT/Voices from the Gay and Lesbian Community by Roger Sutton slashed both the hard and the soft copy. I can only speculate on the vandal’s deep-seated fear of ideas engendered by a community that dislikes gays and lesbians. It’s hard to know what the fear is about. Thus my Too Queer Quiz.